24 weeks in

Ten years ago I gave E a book for her to write in during her pregnancy. Today she gave it to me to read. Bless her, she'd written a proper diary throughout her pregnancy and the first few months of her daughter's life. I really had no concept of what she was going through then. I was 25, newly single and having a baby seemed a very long way off.

Anyway it made me think I ought to be recording more of this process as I am growing a human and will probably not be doing this again.

So here's how things are.

Our little girl is growing inside me I am feeling her move every day, which is both reassuring and strange. I don't think she kicks as much as somersaults and dances. I feel her mostly at 6 am when I start the show and she moves a lot. Then when I lay down for a nap at about 2, then at night at 7pm ish and then 10pm ish. She thuds inside me like she's trying to get my attention. I think of her often, and try to imagine what she's like but I can't really tell. I talk to her a bit in my head too and cal her Tilda, she's less Binky more Matilda now. I think of the book and film Matilda and will be telling her how much I wanted a little girl who loved books and that her daddy and I could read to and play with.

Currently I have put on a stone and 4 pounds. This makes me 13 stone. Good god...this is the heaviest I have ever been. I feel chunky but firm and proud of my bump. I don't much like the physical attention of people referring to how I look but guess that's just for them to have something to say or comment on.
I get tired some days, feel very energetic on others. Today I feel great. It is heavy low down, I do feel a stretch across my pelvis, and the pelvic area is generally tight and a bit achy. I wonder if I have a touch of synthesis pubis disorder bit it comes and goes so probably not. Fingers crossed....

Heartburn comes on sometimes. I need to get up in the night a good 2 or 3 times, and need to always be near a loo. Think a bladder infection may be looming at any time. Had one, took the antibiotics, am on the lookout for another.
No stretch marks yet but stomach is very round and hard and bump like. It amazes me to be honest. Apparently she is about 11 inches long. How does she fit in there? I can feel my uterus above my tummy button which appears to be on the verge of popping out. Now that is strange, always been an inny! P is being amazing, he said he loves the fact I am pregnant, I am blooming; my skin and hair are amazing, I look so lovely, he is so proud of me. He talks to her a bit in my tummy, and we sing Edelweiss a little bit. I wish he could feel her move like I can. Maybe soon. He is reading a dad's guide to babies which makes me feel a bit weepy cos she is his daughter and he wants to know all about her and how we will cope. We will, it just may take a bit of getting used to!

Not sure what's going on with work, as a self employed person, of course I can't take maternity leave I am not an employee, so got to terminate my contract when I give birth then there may be a job for me when I want to go back, there may not. I cannot afford to stress about it right now.

Also cannot afford to stress about labour even tho E's account about it is terrifying. God I hope Rachel the Doula is my saviour!